Each Child. Every Community.

by Mebane Boyd, NCPC’s Resilient Communities Officer 

 “THANK YOU! This made a tremendous difference in my professional journey, which impacts all other areas of my life. Thank you for making us feel seen.”

As we look towards a new year and all we want to accomplish for children and families in 2023, our to-do list may look daunting and overwhelming. There are so many needs as we support children, and often, these needs feel like insurmountable roadblocks to truly changing our world for young children. How can we energize ourselves to dive into our work again?

I want to lift up three practices, looking through a resilience lens that will help us accomplish more, and not burn us out along the way.

1. First, gratitude. Focus on what is good—even if it’s something very, very small. “It’s sunny today.” “It’s rainy today and I can be cozy under my blanket.” My coffee tastes good.”Science tells us that the practice of gratitude can bring better sleep, higher self-esteem, improved mental and physical health, and even help us get through trauma. By regularly taking some time to do this, we will develop the habits to think and live a little more positively.
2. Second, allow yourself to be a priority. I was going to say, “practice self-care,” but it’s said so much we don’t even hear it anymore. I’m sure you’ve all heard the quote, “Hurt people hurt people.” In the same way, people who are well can help other people be well.  Taking care of ourselves, giving ourselves the time we need to heal, regroup, energize, and fill our tanks will enable us to help others help themselves and help communities heal. The Wilkes County Resilience Collaborative hosted an event this fall which included a workshop titled, “Serve from the Overflow.”  Many of us attempt to serve others when our own tank is not full, and this workshop brought home the importance of making sure we are well so that we can stay in this work for the long haul.
3. Third, Invest in building relationships. We will go further together. And, to go together, we have to invest in the time and energy necessary to be willing to truly travel in the same boat.

The Retreat

“It was one of the best retreats I have ever attended. I felt an instant connection with everyone in the room, a sense of shared purpose, and a welcoming spirit from everyone. It was wonderful. Thank you!!!”

The NC Healthy & Resilient Community Initiative (NC HRCI) hosted a two-day retreat for local resilience coalition leaders through funding from the Kate B. Reynolds Charitable Trust in November 2022. As part of the retreat, we practiced the above-mentioned steps of gratitude, making yourself a priority, and investing in relationships to build a more resilient group of leaders working together to create a brighter future for young children.

Gratitude. I am grateful to KBR and to the NCPC staff who truly exemplified what teamwork looks like when putting on an event, and for our partners at the Duke Center for Child and Family Health who facilitated the first day’s presentations around “Moving from Trauma-informed to Healing-centered.”
I am grateful for the 45 local leaders who carved out time to attend the Resilience Retreat in November. They brought their authentic selves, shared in honest and deep dialog, and were willing to set aside their day-to-day work to connect with one another, heal, and let go.

Be a priority. We pushed aside our cultural pressures of “WORK!” and took time to recharge. We shared stories and ideas, went for walks, worked on puzzles and embroidery. We ate hearty meals and made s’mores around a campfire and talked into the night.

Invest in Relationships. How did this help further our work? What did this have to do with building resilient communities? We formed friendships and strengthened relationships with people we can call on when we’re stuck. We gained the knowledge that we aren’t alone in this work, that others face similar challenges, that what may feel like lonely work doesn’t have to be, and I hope in the end, everyone felt like they had a safe place to challenge their ideas of what we can do better.

We can hold one another accountable for the work we promise to do, because of the relationships. We can challenge one another when something doesn’t feel quite right because we have been together to do things besides work.

I hope 2023 is a year in which you find gratitude, prioritize your own well-being, and develop deep and meaningful relationships that will enable you to have a successful year!

“THANK YOU SOOOOO MUCH!!! This was truly, truly such a blessing! Thank you so much for having this space! What a gift!!!”

About the NC Healthy & Resilient Communities Initiative  

NCPC hosts the NC Healthy & Resilient Communities Initiative (NC HRCI). Starting in 2019, the work has focused on bringing together and learning from the dozens of local ACEs/Resilience coalitions across North Carolina, building the capacity and resources for these multi-sector coalitions to address the Four Realms of ACEs. To join a monthly gathering of peers engaged in this work from across the state, e-mail Resilient Communities Officer, Mebane Boyd, to attend the Peer Connection gathering and to receive monthly resources and updates about creating resilient communities where everyone can thrive.